Wash in the Hood

Taken in the wash.  In my neighborhood.  Except the agave--that's in my yard.

Home sick.

I have a hard time resting, even when I really need to.  But I stayed home sick today with a cold, and tried not to feel guilty for not going to work.  It was the perfect sort of day to be at home on the couch watching Twin Peaks: rainy and dark and full of magic, as days like that often are--especially in these parts, where they are seldom.

I stood in the kitchen earlier looking out at the strange unnamed tree in our backyard that has shed most of its leaves.  Through its branches the sun was a white orb in the mist.  It was so silent I felt like the only person on earth.  I felt the mystery and the strangeness of everything; and I understood that I understand nothing.

Now I'm reading W.S. Merwin poems in the half-light.  There are quail calling from the little ravine across the street.  And that other bird I haven't been able to identify. 

Soon I won't be able to see.

Unknown Bird

Out of the dry days
through the dusty leaves
far across the valley
those few notes never
heard here before

one fluted phrase
floating over its
wandering secret
all at once wells up
somewhere else

and is gone before it
goes fallen into
its own echo leaving
a hollow through the air
that is dry as before

where is it from
hardly anyone
seems to have noticed it
so far but who now
would have been listening

it is not native here
that may be the one
thing we are sure of
it came from somewhere
else perhaps alone

so keeps on calling for
no one who is here
hoping to be heard
by another of its own
unlikely origin

trying once more the same few
notes that began the song
of an oriole last heard
years ago in another
existence there

it goes again tell
no one it is here
foreign as we are
who are filling the days
with a sound of our own

--W.S. Merwin

"To be, or not to be"--

is that the question?  Here we are.  The universe is vast & we are fumbling through it.  I'm fumbling, anyway--perhaps you're dancing effortlessly.  But I'm a late bloomer, still pulling myself up out of the dirt, shedding seed coats & artifice.  Still learning how to be true to myself.  I have moments, of course, when everything is in tune, & I am the golden bird.

Even when I'm not, everything is.  Nothing isn't.

Here's a poem by Wallace Stevens.

Of Mere Being

The palm at the end of the mind,
Beyond the last thought, rises
In the bronze decor,

A gold-feathered bird
Sings in the palm, without human meaning,
Without human feeling, a foreign song.

You know that is not the reason
That makes us happy or unhappy.
The bird sings.  Its feathers shine.

The palm stands at the edge of space.
The wind moves slowly in the branches.
The bird's fire-fangled feathers dangle down.

Happy 3rd of July!

Ahh, cool coconut water after a long morning walk. I woke up at 5:45 today and actually got up! I want to start getting up earlier every day, and this should be very easy because I can't sleep! The monsoons are finally here, and the humidity is rendering the swamp cooler worthless. When it shoots up from 2% to 40, you can really feel it. Let's check today's forecast: high of 103 with a 30% chance of rain. Not bad! I'm using lots of exclamation points today! I guess I'm excited to be awake! Ah, but to be Awake. That would be something.

Let's hunt down a poem. What would be appropriate? A patriotic elegy? A star-spangled sestina? An ode to hotdogs?  Hmm...

People are going to be grilling like mad and shooting off fireworks regardless of the fact that we're surrounded by tinder and half the state is on fire. We're free, garshdarnit--let's blow some stuff up!!!

HUM BOM!

by Allen Ginsberg

I

Whom bomb?
We bomb'd them!
Whom bomb?
We bomb'd them!
Whom bomb?
We bomb'd them!
Whom bomb?
We bomb'd them!
Whom bomb?
We bomb you!
Whom bomb?
We bomb you!
Whom bomb?
You bomb you!
Whom bomb?
You bomb you!
What do we do?
Who do we bomb?
What do we do?
Who do we bomb?
What do we do?
Who do we bomb?
What do we do?
Who do we bomb?
What do we do?
You bomb! You bomb them!
What do we do?
You bomb! You bomb them!
What do we do?
We bomb! We bomb you!
What do we do?
You bomb! You bomb you!
Whom bomb?
We bomb you!
Whom bomb?
We bomb you!
Whom bomb? You bomb you!
Whom bomb?
You bomb you!
May 1971

II

For Don Cherry
Whydja bomb?
We didn't wanna bomb!
Whydja bomb?
We didn't wanna bomb!
Whydja bomb?
You didn't wanna bomb!
Whydja bomb?
You didn't wanna bomb!
Who said bomb?
Who said we hadda bomb?
Who said bomb?
Who said we hadda bomb?
Who said bomb?
Who said you hadda bomb?
Who said bomb?
Who said you hadda bomb?
Who wantsa bomb?
We don't wanna bomb!
Who wantsa bomb?
We don't wanna bomb!
Who wantsa bomb?
We don't wanna bomb!
We don't wanna
we don't wanna
we don't wanna bomb!
Who wanteda bomb?
Somebody musta wanteda bomb!
Who wanteda bomb?
Somebody musta wanteda bomb!
Who wanteda bomb?
Somebody musta wanteda bomb!
Who wanteda bomb?
Somebody musta wanteda bomb!
They wanteda bomb!
They neededa bomb!
They wanteda bomb!
They neededa bomb!
They wanteda bomb!
They neededa bomb!
They wanteda bomb!
They neededa bomb!
They thought they hadda bomb!
They thought they hadda bomb!
They thought they hadda bomb!
They thought they hadda bomb!
Saddam said he hadda bomb!
Bush said he better bomb!
Saddam said he hadda bomb!
Bush said he better bomb!
Saddam said he hadda bomb!
Bush said he better bomb!
Saddam said he hadda bomb!
Bush said he better bomb!
Whatdid he say he better bomb for?
Whatdid he say he better bomb for?
Whatdid he say he better bomb for?
Whatdid he say he better bomb for?
Hadda get ridda Saddam with a bomb!
Hadda get ridda Saddam with a bomb!
Hadda get ridda Saddam with a bomb!
Hadda get ridda Saddam with a bomb!
Saddam's still there building a bomb!
Saddam's still there building a bomb!
Saddam's still there building a bomb!
Saddam's still there building a bomb!

III

Armageddon did the job
Gog & Magog Gog & Magog
Armageddon did the job
Gog & Magog Gog & Magog
Gog & Magog Gog & Magog
Armageddon does the job
Gog & Magog Gog & Magog
Armageddon does the job
Armageddon for the mob
Gog & Magog Gog & Magog
Armageddon for the mob
Gog & Magog Gog & Magog
Gog & Magog Gog & Magog
Gog Magog Gog Magog
Gog & Magog Gog & Magog
Gog Magog Gog Magog
Gog Magog Gog Magog
Gog Magog Gog Magog
Gog Magog Gog Magog
Gog Magog Gog Magog
Ginsberg says Gog & Magog
Armageddon did the job.

*   *   *

Have a peaceful Independence Day!